In this Season: "She is Painfully Attractive"

(As promised, a long time ago in my letter to women, here it is:)

A friend shared how painful it is to be extremely attracted to someone in the wrong season, or that season of unpreparedness.

During that season, you know it is unwise to pursue or take an action, or in other foreign terms, make ligaw. An admirable man respects women. Most especially the woman he admires.

He won't make extra-special move/s until he is sure to his heart that this is the person he will be with for the rest of his life. In Christian lingo it's called, 'God's will'. In our church, they want to label it as 'GB', God's Best -which I'm uneasy to use for the phrase implies to many that God's Best refers only to your future partner.

When extreme attraction comes in this season, the challenge to be a stable, above reproach, and admirable man is building its walls to the sky, as though it is impossible to reach. So we try to put into words how exactly we feel, 'She is Painfully Attractive'. Excruciatingly painful.

We cannot make an obvious move yet. We should not. We want to protect our actions. We don't want her confused. Because we are serious about this, because we seriously like her. Thus, she becomes excruciatingly attractive.

Don't get me wrong women. It's not your fault. Stay beautiful. Stay admirable. Stay attractive. We're just on our way, getting ourselves ready. For now, we are just here to admire you, and stop ourselves from doing anything stupid -and that is painful.

Liking someone is normal. It is not elementary, not even high school or college thingy. Do not think that mature people don't get attracted towards the opposite sex. Liking someone is not bad. We were naturally created that way, to get attracted to what is beautiful.

However, being in this season, doing something you know would lead to something else more than friendship, isn't nice at all. The process is not a secret anymore.

First, you give attention to her that results to the other person reciprocating it. Then reciprocating attention can turn to reciprocated attraction, until it becomes real to each of them. The possibility of the other person reciprocating becomes higher the moment you got involved into that series of proximity through hangouts, chats, texts, calls, dinners, and more.

There is nothing wrong with the process when done at the right time, and with pure and clear motivation. The process is great! It is almost always effective in building relationships.

The problem is, this process can be a trap for the unprepared people who don't know when to slow down and pause. When you're in it, it feels like a snow ball getting bigger and bigger as you roll down the mountain covered with a thick heavy snow.

For the young people, for people my age, and those who are sharing the same sentiments with me in this season of preparation, I urge all of us to stay attracted, but remember not to start the snow ball rolling. Get help. Be accountable. Get yourself ready, now!

I will never forget what one of my favorite teachers would always say. I imagine him saying this in his soft old voice, old but bold enough to speak with authority:

There is a prepared place, for a prepared person.

My own version would be, There is a prepared person, for a prepared person. Then you'll never say she is painfully attractive anymore for you are ready to make a move. Go on.

SPECIAL ADDITION!!!

That's it! Liking, admiring, and being attracted to someone is one of our strongest traits as human being. God created us that way. We are naturally attracted to what is beautiful. However all beauties in this world are nothing compared to the beauty of Jesus. They are but a reflection of the perfect glory of God.

The beauty of the nature, the universe, the greatness and beauty of people around you, they all declare the glory of God. No beauty on earth can satisfy us except the beauty of the cross of Jesus. He wants you to look at him, and he wants you to understand that it is only through Him that you will find satisfaction.

Look at Him. Receive Him. Taste and see what beauty, glory, and perfection really mean. Attraction will eventually turn to love. And I would end with this note,

Love, we cannot ultimately give, until His love, we have wholeheartedly received.